


A Story of a Not-So-Innocent Remus and a Too-Jealous-for-his-own-good Sirius

by gracegraylove



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Barebacking, Black Lake scene never happened, Blow Jobs, Bottom Sirius Black, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, Good Peter, Hand Jobs, Hung Remus, James isn't a prick, Jealous Sirius Black, Jealousy, Library Sex, Light Angst, M/M, MWPP, Masturbation, Misunderstandings, Not Beta Read, POV Sirius Black, Remus Lupin has a big dick, Remus sleeps with a lot of people, Remus too, Requited Unrequited Love, Rimming, Sirius is horny, Size Kink, They don't bully Severus anymore, Top Remus Lupin, and Sirius doesn't like that, but no STDs, experienced Remus, kinda Oblivious Sirius, lmao what am i even tagging
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:35:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28027122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gracegraylove/pseuds/gracegraylove
Summary: Remus. The sweet innocent boy, that wears cardigans and sweaters and beanies and loves chocolate.Remus. His best mate since the very first train ride to Hogwarts.Remus. Who blushes when something even slightly 'inappropriate' comes up.Remus.Who apparenty shags boys and does quickies and one-offs.Sirius. Who isn't jealous at all.
Relationships: Benjy Fenwick/Remus Lupin, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, brief Remus Lupin/Evan Rosier
Comments: 28
Kudos: 153





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome! This is a new fic, the idea has been stuck in my head for SO FUCKING LONG! I just love Sirius realizing he likes Remus through jealousy but I can't find that many and yeah.  
> Anyways! It's not beta read and I'm not a native speaker so like-- sorry in advance for mistakes, feel free to point out!
> 
> It's not finished yet, but I don't know when I can update, stuff is crazy right now and yeah. Sorry i it takes longer to update than intended, I hope you'll still read!
> 
> Have fun! <3

"Oh Merlin, Prongs what the fuck?" Sirius laughed at the absurdity of James' "wooing-plan-to-get-Evans-to-like-him". It apparently involved an apology to Snivellus and becoming friends with him. Love makes people idiots.

"Never mind, I'm gonna go tell Moony about your 'Oh-so-brilliant-plan'. I'm sure he'll love it, he wanted you to stop bully Snape for a long time now mate."

"Ugh, you do that, I'll just daydream and gaze into this lovely fire, the same color as her hair..." And what the actual hell, he actally looked at the fire lovingly, like he wanted the _fireplace_ to date him. Sirius huffed at the ridiculous thought and made his way upstairs, halting at the door. He got into the room as quietly as possible, wanting to scare Remus, whatever he was doing. But then he halted.

There were _moans_ filling the dorm and _holy fuck._ Sirius stood dumbfounded, listening to slick flesh and huffs of breath and came to the _obvious_ conclusion that Remus was _wanking._ He blushed, because he never actually thought Remus would do such thing. But maybe he just knew how to keep quiet, the lack of sound coming from the other side of the dorm door signaling a _Silencio_ casted on the door. He just made his way out, wanting to give Remus his privacy, when he heard it.

" _Oh, yes!"_

He stood, frozen once again, eyes wide as plates and turning to face Remus' bed. He couldn't see a lot, the curtains blocking the view, but if he looked closely enough, he made out to figures, hunched together and moving rhythmically. Was Remus... And mother of _Merlin,_ Remus was getting some! He was GETTING LAID! Oh, the sweet innocent Remus _finally_ finding a girl worth his time.

Sirius smiled wickedly, as he cast a feather-light charm on his feet and approached the bed. He was hoping to hear the moans of the girl to make out who it was. Must be some smart book girl. Maybe that one Hufflepuff, what-ever-her-name-was? Or the cute Ravenclaw that was hitting on Remus two weeks ago. He was only a few feet away, when he heard a moan again. It was strange, because it was clearly manly, too deep and rough to be a girl, but it didn't sound like Remus.

' _Maybe it's his bedroom voice'_ , a not-very-helpful voice in his mind told him.

He started to think that it was it, when he froze.

"Oh, oh yes, Remus, oh right OH! Fuck Remus you're so fucking big oh Merlin, oh Lord! Yes, yes, _yes!_ "

That. Was. A. Boy's. Voice.

A boy was in Remus' bed.

Moaning his name.

Ergo: Remus was fucking him.

Holy shit.

"Yes, come on Remus, harder, please harder Remus I swear fuck me harder!"

His brain shutting off completely, he swayed on his feet as his brain caught on on what was happening. Remus was shagging a boy. Remus was queer. Remus had, apparently, a huge dick and knew how to use it if the louder moans and the creaking bed was anything to go by.

"Mhh you like that? Look at how you take my cock, perfect. Oh so utterly- ffffuck! Oh yeah like that, come on."

Bloody hell, that was Remus, talking _dirty_ to a _boy_ while he was _fucking him_.

"Ah yes Remus so gooood oh! OHHH FUCK FUCK YES A LITTLE MORE YESSSS," the boy was groaning.

"Oh you gonna come like that, just on my big cock, aren't you? Not even touching yourself, huh Evan?"

Nope. No fucking _way_ that Remus was shagging _Evan Rosier._

"Fuck Remus Remus oh ah ohhh yes fuck fuck me Remus!"

Sirius stormed out of the room, a quick _Finite Incantatem_ cancelling the charm on his feet. He breathed deep and fast ast his head wrapped itself around _RemusisshaggingaboyRemusisfuckingEvanRosierwhattheactualfuckandhisbedroomvoiceisfuckinghotandohMerlinstop_.

But, he managed to put on his nonchalant face as he strolled into the common room to play wizards chess.

Twenty minutes later, Remus came down with disheveled hair and a blush staining his freckled cheeks.

* * *

From that on, Sirius started noticing... _things._ 'Things' being _boys_ _looking at Remus and him looking right back_. Wherever they went, there was at least one guy who would gaze at Remus appreciatively. Checking him out. He also noticed the boys that came to their table to ask for tutoring.

Sirius knew that they always were _there_ , he noticed them, but only since that night did he _notice them_. He noticed the suggestive tone, the flirty fidgeting, the small but unnecessary touches.

And the way Remus _flirted back_! He'd often smile rather coyly, leave lingering touches on shoulders or arms. He'd also say nothing if one of the boys stepped into his private space. _What the fuck?_

"Uh, I'll be going now," Remus said and snapped Sirius out of his thoughts.

"Go where?" He asked with narrowed eyes. Remus looked at him confused, tilted head and all. "Uhm, Pads? I told you I'm tutoring Benjy Fenwick in charms."

Sirius huffed. "He's a Ravenclaw, why does he need tutoring?" Remus looked even more confused now. "Sirius, Ravenclaws sometimes need tutors when they don't understand things. He isn't sure how to do the _Confundo_ wand movement." Sirius bit back a choke. "Riiiight. Wand movement. SO you're going to help him hold his _wand,_ aren't you, Remus?"

Remus looked shocked for a moment before looking cold. "Right. Sirius, I don't know what the hell is wrong with you these days, please sort it out and tell me or don't." With these words he turned around to leave, leaving a clenching in Sirius' gut. "Uh..." Oh right, James was there, too. "Prongs, I need your cloak. And the map." "Why, you gonna follow Moony?"

Sirius looked at him, an insane sparkle in his eyes. "Yes."  
_________________

That's how he found himself hiding behind a shelf in the library, watching Remus actually tutoring Benjy Fenwick. He felt slightly ashamed of himself and almost cursed himself internally, when suddenly...

"No, Ben, you're holding it wrong. No wonder it has the wrong effect." Both boys laughed and Sirius felt a little bit sick. "Oh yeah? Will you show me how to hold my wand then?" Benjy looked over his shoulder to glance at Remus with a coy smirk. A smirk that was _returned_ by Remus, who stepped closer and... oh.

Who stepped up right behind Benjy, pressing his whole body against the other boy. Remus took Benjy's arm, that held his wand and dragged it into the right position. Remus' mouth leaned in, until it was right next to Benjy's ear and whispered, just so loud that Sirius' ear could catch it: "Yes, just like that."

Benjy hummed and pressed himself closer to the other boy, actually _rolling_ his hips, _grinding_ himself down onto Remus. His answer was breathy and voice thick. "Mhh, thank you, you've been a real help, _Professor._ "

The next few seconds passed in a blur in front of Sirius: Remus spun Benjy around, Benjy threw his wand on the table, Remus attacked Benjy's mouth with vigour, Remus picked Benjy up by his hips and slammed him onto the table, the slick sound of tongues sliding against each other and rough sound of jeans grinding against each other and husky, breathy moans and hand gripping and tearing and exploring over and under the school robes. They broke off panting and deft fingers undid both flies and pulled out both cocks and _oh_ maybe now it was time for Sirius to _run away_ but he was _gl_ _ued to the spot_ and _what_.

Remus' back was to Sirius but he could see Benjy's face and _holy god_ his face lit up like a christmas tree.

"The rumors were true, were they?" Benjy's hand slowly went down to where Remus' cock was and Sirius just _wanted to see_ but he couldn't. He could see Remus leaning in towards Benjy's neck and he trew his head back, moaning as Remus obviously devoured his neck. Then a louder moan when Remus hand slipped between the boys and Sirius could only _imagine_ what Remus was doing.

"Oh fuck-" Benjy was clawing at Remus' shoulders now while Remus' mouth was firmly attached to Benjy's jaw and his arm was working quicker and Sirius couldn't stand it anymore he turned and fled.

Remus came back more than an hour later looking positively blissed out.

* * *

"Sirius."

Remus voice was shy and quiet and somewhat pained. Their dorm was quiet, apart from Prongs' and Wormtail's snoring. Sirius ignored Remus, but the other boy knew him too well. He heard a quick _"Silencio"_ and felt the silencing wards close around them.

"Sirius, I know you're not sleeping. Please, can we talk?" Sirius sighed and turned around, facing Remus' bed. "Then talk."

"Look, Sirius. I don't know what your problem is, okay? You're just... You're ignoring me and avoiding me and you're different. Please, tell me what's wrong, yeah?" Remus was sitting on the edge of his bed, head low, but Sirius could hear the hurt in his voice nonetheless. Sirius swallowed the stab of guilt.

"Nothing, Remus. Go back to sleep."

"Please! Did I do something wrong? Tell me!" His voice had a hysterical edge to it now.

"No, you didn't! I just!" Remus looked to his side. "Please, Sirius. You're my best friend. Why won't you talk me?" Sirius gave an exasperated sigh. "Go talk to.. I don't know. Noah. Or go talk to Benjy. Or Evan or whoever you fucked." Remus looked up, surprised, but then his face split into an expression of understanding and then pain and hurt.

"Oh. I understand. I- Look, Sirius, I will keep my distance to you, you won't have to feel uncomfortable around me." Sirius looked up, confused, when he saw a pearly tear roll down the freckled cheek. Remus waved his hand, ended the _Silencio_ stood up and grabbed his cloak. Sirius didn't have time to ask him where he was going because Remus just closed the door behind him. What the hell just happened? Uncomfortable? Keep distance? Why would Sirius want that? He got up to look for the map but woke up James in the process. A messy brown head appeared from under the covers.

"Oi mate, what the hell?" His sleepy voice was rough.

"I need... the map..." James reached under his bed. "There you go, mate, but. What for?"

"I..." Sirius halted for a short moment. "He ran off. Moony. I don't know where to, but I think I said something to upset him."

"Do... Do you really think it's a good idea to look for him when he's angry at you? Here, gimme that, I'll look for him," James offered, stretching his hand out. He was probably right. Remus only walks away when he doesn't want to be found, and right now, he didn't want to be found. At least not by Sirius. So, yes, James was right and he handed over the map. He watched as James dressed quickly and took the Invisibility-cloak, only called out when James was at the door. "Oi, Prongs," he called. "I really don't know what I did to him. But he looked hurt. I saw a tear. Please just... sort it out, k?" James nodded and then he was gone.

When he came back with Remus, neither of them acknowledged Sirius.

* * *

It was unnerving. Now not only was _he_ keeping distance to _Remus,_ _Remus_ was positively avoiding him too! And _James, too!!!_ What the hell were they talking about, he asked himself the umpteenth time that week. It's been four days since Remus and Sirius talked, and that was stupid. Utterly stupid. And James was sending him dirty looks now and only speaking to him the minimum of words.

Also, _how often does Remus shag?_ It had been _four fucking days,_ and Sirius had caught Remus _three times_. Like, what the bloody hell??

First time he had caught him was a day after _the talk_. It had been in an abandoned classroom, Sirius had passed it after the stairs led him to the wrong path, when he had heard... _noises_.

They had been muffled so he pressed his ear against the wooden door and heard:

"Ah fuck!"

He had known instantaneously who it was. He heard that voice every day for the last six years. Well, had heard. But never in that tone. He had bent until he could press his eye against the door lock and had seen Remus, leaning against the teachers desk, trousers shoved to his feet. A kneeling person had been in front of him, bobbing their head up and down what must've been Remus shaft. Remus' fingers had been tugging the dark brown strands of hair and his head had been thrown back in pleasure, as his hips bucked and he moaned loudly.

The second time he had caught him was the day after that incident.

Quidditch training had ended earlier that day, Prongs had been out to woo Evans and Sirius had just been happy to enjoy a quiet dorm.

He wished.

He had barely stepped in front of the door when he heard the groans and 'Oh yes's and 'Oh Merlin's and 'Oh fuck Remus you're so big's. It was like Remus was doing it on purpose. Fucking in front of Sirius' nose just to annoy the hell out of him.

The third time was now.

In the library. But this time, it was different. It was Benjy Fenwick again, that sodding bastard. But this time, it was really different, it was slow, sensual, emotional. They were kissing, slowly kissing, tongues sliding together in a dance of saliva and Sirius felt a pang in his stomach. Remus was pressing Benjy up against a shelf and he could see the slow movements of his hips, mirrored by the slightly shorter boy. Benjy was moaning into the kiss and Remus drew back to smile. Soft, murmured words were shared and both boys smiled, their hips still rolling and grinding, harder with each movement, and the boys were panting now, still holding eye contact, still sharing soft pecks to each others lips. They held up their slow dance of hips until both shuddered and reached their climaxes. After they finished, Remus rested his forehead against Benjy's shoulder, smiling softly. Benjy's hand came up to thread his fingers through thick locks, massaging the scalp softly.

Sirius turned on his heels and fled, ignoring the way his stomach twisted.  
_________________________

It was after curfew when Sirius came back to their shared dorm. He hesitated at the door for a moment and listened. There were excited words being shared and Sirius felt a pang in his chest at being excluded. He went inside and just caught the snippets of Remus, James and Peter's conversation, " _No way! Wow, I'm so happy for you, Moons!" "Oh god Remus what are you going to wear?" "Oh shut up, it's just a date." "No way! He's a great bloke, Moons! You look happy!"_ when the three of them went quiet. He hung his head low and went over to his bed, drawing the curtains shut and letting his tears drop.

_Date_

_Happy_

_Great bloke_

_Happy._

Their hushed conversation continued after that, too quiet for Sirius to understand.

* * *

It was Hogsmeade weekend. Of course did the Marauders go. Just...

"Remus, you can't go wear _something_!" An exasperated Peter yelled.

"Oh fuck off, Pete. He should like me whatever I wear," an annoyed Remus yelled back.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, BOTH OF YOU! Wormy, you can't actually think _your_ outfit looks good. Moony, you like you picked your clothes out of garbage. Here," he said, shoving a cream colored jumper into Remus' arms. Sirius grimaced, the color didn't match well with Remus' hair.

"Hey, uhm... What about the maroon jumper? With the golden seam? You could match it with the maroon beanie..." Sirius looked away shyly, a blush creeping up his neck. He shouldn't've said anything, he should've just kept quiet, should've-

"Oh, thanks, Pads! You, uh, you're right. It's perfect."

He looked up at Remus and smiled hesitantly, heart bursting in his chest when it was reciprocated.

"Hey, you guys can go, I want to speak with Remus real quick, okay?" Sirius asked just before they stormed outside the dorm. Peter and James gave Remus questioning looks and went outside when the boy just nodded. After the closed the door, Remus turned to look at Sirius and Sirius' one thought was _Shit he's beautiful_ before he caught himself. Remus' head was tilted in a silent question and Sirius gulped twice before opening his mouth to speak.

"I'm sorry," was all he said.

"I'm sorry, for, for making you upset, for making you mad, for making you sad, I'm sorry for whatever I said. I don't really know, Moons, what I did, but please forgive me." He looked down at his feet, struggling to keep his tears from spilling.

He felt a calloused hand at his chin, softly tilting it up, so he was looking at Remus' beautiful hazel eyes. They were a shade of forest green and honey gold and sky blue and everything.

"You... you honestly don't know?" He sighed when Sirius shook his head. "Look. You... you sounded so... so _mad_ when you told me the names of the boys I've slept with and I just. I thought you were uncomfortable with... you know. Me. Being queer."

Sirius was confused until everything clicked in his head and then it suddenly made sense and _god_ he was an _idiot_.

"Remus! Merlin, I'm so sorry! I didn't realize that you thought- Oh god you thought I was a homophobe! I'm- No I'm so sorry! I guess... I guess I was just disappointed that you didn't tell me. I mean, you've slept with more people simply in the last two weeks than me in this whole year! Fuck, Remus, of course I support you, I'm sorry I've been such a moron."

Remus eyes were full of unshed tears now and he quickly slung his arms around Sirius and hugged him tightly. Sirius' heart roared but he didn't know why so he ignored it. After a while of hugging he felt Remus' shoulders shake and for a split moment he panicked, thinking the boy was crying when he realized-

He was laughing!

"Oi you shit! Why are you laughing!" But Sirius couldn't help but giggle as well so they laughed and giggled until Remus shouted "Shit, the train!" and both boys ran laughing, catching the train to Hogsmeade.

* * *

Sirius didn't know why, but his insides felt like they were burning. Literally combusting. Like he'd cast an _Incendio_ in a goblet and swallowed it. He was sitting with James and Peter on a bench, eating sweets they had bought in Honeydukes. He was vaguely aware of Prongs and Wormtail chatting, but his gaze was fixated on Remus. To be exact, Remus and his _date,_ Benjy Fenwick.

He was watching as they were sharing a chocolate bar, he watched as Fenwick said something causing Remus to throw his head back and laugh.

Sirius knew he was selfish. Remus deserved someone who made him laugh. But he couldn't explain the ball of fury in his stomach.

Now he watched as Remus leaned closer to cup Benjy's face in his large hand. Sirius watched as they leaned closer and closer-

"Oi mate, I don't know what your problem is. I thought you sorted it out with Moony," James' voice startled him out of his thoughts.

"I- James I don't know what's bloody wrong with me. I don't mind Moony being queer," he said sincerely. "I just... every time I think of him and another bloke, it's like my stomach is going to explode and I suddenly feel like I'm going to turn to ash right then and there." Realizing how it sounded, he winced. "Shit, I'm a homophobe, aren't I. But why-"

"Fuck. Pads, I don't think what you're feeling is homophobia," James said, eyes wide. "What the bloody hell are you talking about?"

Peter continued. "I think what James is trying to tell you, Pads, is that you aren't homophobig, you're jealous."

Sirius spluttered. Then turned red. "J-Jealous? What the hell, mate! Why woul-"

Peter held up a finger and James grinned. "Nuh-uh mate. How do you feel when Remus is with another boy? Look over at Fenwick and Remus and tell me what you feel."

So, Sirius turned and faced the couple again. They were talking now, Remus gesturing something while Benjy was looking at him like he was the only thing that mattered.

"I feel like my stomach is on fire. Like my chest is gonna explode. Like my eyeballs will blow up watching this.. this _moron_ touch _my-_ I mean, _Moony_ , I- I mean, that- What- not like- I didn't mea-"

James only laughed, teasingly, while Peter positively _beamed_. "You. Are. Jealous! Oh god, James! Pay the fuck up!" Sirius watched with narrowed eyes as Prongs put three Galleons in Peter's hand, both boys shaking with laughter. Then Sirus understood.

"Oi you little shits! What the hell! You were BETTING? What the fuck! Prongs! Wormy! I feel betr- stop laughing, for Merlin's sake! Oi!"

Every word seemed to make the two boys laugh even more and Sirius gave up to try to calm them, instead turned to watch Moony. And his _date_. Was it possible that he was jealous? No, why? Why would he be jealous, only because he can't stand to watch a boy being near Remus, touching him, kissing him, fucking him- or rather getting fucked by him. Ok, maybe a little, teeny tiny bit. But as Benjy casually laid a hand on Remus waist as the walked and Remus put his arm around Benjy's shoulders to pull him closer, he knew he couldn't deny it anymore.

He was jealous.

Why?

Because he had a crush on Remus Lupin.

Well, fuck.

* * *

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

"-important to add only two pieces to the cauldron, then it should turn a shade of green-"

Sirius wasn't listening to Remus' rambling, he was looking at Benjy, who was sitting _much_ too close to Remus than necessary, looking at him with wide eyes and nodding, writing down notes on his page as Remus talked.

"-amardillo bile, then it should turn from red to yellowish-"

Now Benjy is nodding and looking at Remus through his lashes, piercing blue eyes watching Remus' movements rather... fondly? Affectionately? Ew.

"-then you stir anti-clockwise until it explodes. Right, Sirius?"

Sirius perked up from his position and looked at Remus, who apparently asked him a question. He nodded dumbly and Remus face-palmed, shaking his head."You stir it _clockwise_ , Sirius. And certainly not until it explodes. You haven't been listening, have you?" He asked and Sirius nodded again, slightly ashamed.

Remus sighed, before turning to Benjy, looking apologetic. "Sorry, now I've been boring you for nothing. He's like that, sometimes. Doesn't listen." Remus shrugged and Sirius turned beet-red when Benjy bit his lip to stifle his laughter. Arse, how dare he laugh at Sirius? But then Benjy tugged Remus _even fucking closer_ by his collar and whispered against Remus' lips. "Oh, Re, you're fucking hot in teacher-mode." And then kissed him soundly, while Sirius just stared, wide-eyed, at Remus being snogged in _right_ front of his homework. He thought that maybe, _maybe,_ Moony'd get uncomfortable at such PDA, but _no_ , he fucking _grabbed_ the back of Benjy's neck and _plunged_ his fucking tongue _into_ his mouth and _holy shit_. Now he was literally _fucking Benjy's mouth with his tongue_ and they were _moaning_ and Sirius was getting _hard_ and- 

And now they were panting but no longer invading each other's mouth and grinning then Remus turned and said out of breath, "Sorry, Pads. Gotta go, ask Pete. He can help you with homework." Then he shrugged and stood up, followed by Benjy, whose boner was visible, as he was wearing muggle jeans, and they both left, almost ravishing each other while walking, leaving Sirius flustered, horny AND angry.

Remus had left. He had _never_ left before. He always took his time with Sirius and explained properly, even though Sirius was more often than not tuning out and listening to Remus' gravelly, deep voice and watching the movement of his soft, pink lips.

Well, now that he thought about it, his crush _was_ pretty obvious, and he was slapping himself internally for being so thick and not noticing before.

* * *

Sirius didn't have a problem with Benjy _per se_ , it was just that the other boy was mingling with the Marauders _wherever_ they _fucking_ went. Sirius noticed that Remus was happy, of course he did.

The constant smile was one indicator. His mood was also visibly better. He was more playful, as well, joking around and being a tad bit more immature than before. He also seemed to glow when Benjy was with them, and even James and Peter noticed.

"Oi, Moony, you're so fucking whipped," James said one Saturday at breakfast. Sirius snapped his head up just to catch Remus looking at him, before he turned away with a cute blush coloring his freckles.

"Shut up, Prongs. Says you, running after Evans like a duckling," Remus retorted. James blushed furiously.

"Oh do fuck off, Moons. I think she's warming up. As much as it hurts me to admit it, I think calling a truce with Snape helped. A lot. Also, he isn't the slimy git I thought he was. He explained this potion shit to me. It really helped!"

Sirius imitated a gag and rolled his eyes, "This woman better be worth it, mate." James just threw a sausage at him while Remus and Peter snorted.

They were joking around, everything was fine, until the owls flew in with the daily mail. It was actually as usual, Pete got his _Prophet_ , James and Sirius got their weekend-letter from Euphemia and Fleamont, and Remus got... Remus usually didn't get anything. But, there was an owl, carrying a package and letting it drop _right_ in front of Remus. It was a box, not very big, but also not small, with a golden red ribbon. There was also a card.

Around them, a few Gryffindors looked curiously, because everyone knew that Remus didn't get post on Saturdays. He only got letters once a month, from his mother (and only the Marauders knew what for).

But Remus only blushed, didn't even touch the card, turned around and mouthed a 'thank you' across the hall. Sirius' instantly knew who the gift was from, and his eyes turned stony.

That _blasted, bloody Benjy_.

"So?", he asked, and Remus turned around to face him. "What did he get you?" Remus blushed and looked down, a small smile grazing his lips, "I don't really think any of you want to know that. But even if, I don't think it's suited to tell over food." He grinned while James barked out a laugh, Peter choked on his food and Sirius' eyes widened at the implication.

He tuned out for the rest of the breakfast, the only thing in mind being _BenjygiftedRemussomethinginappropriatetodiscussoverbreakfastwhatcoulditbe_.

* * *

"Padfoot?"  
  
Sirius head snapped up from the essay he was writing on his bed to see Remus looking at him. "Hmm?"

"What's wrong?"

_I keep thinking about that box you got from Benjy and I really wanna know what it is!_

"Uhh, nothing?"

But Remus looked at him with a crooked smile. "Pads..."

"What?"

"You do realize that you just said that out loud, right?"

Sirius turned beet-red. The sentence he tried getting out was inaudible and Remus laughed, "Well, if you really wanna know, I can show you. Don't be embarrassed, though." Sirius managed a weak, "Aight mate," and Remus stood up from his bed and ducked underneath it, only to fish out the box from earlier, this time the ribbon wasn't there, though. He went over and sat down next to Sirius, placing the box between them. 

"All right. Now, I know what you'll be thinking, but it isn't like that, okay? We were talking about... stuff the other day and yeah. We found out that we both wanted to try something new and so he asked his cousin - who is a Muggle - to buy him this. And yeah. There, you can look yourself," he said, gesturing towards the package.

Hesitantly, Sirius placed the box in his lap and opened it. His jaw dropped to the floor. He looked disbelievingly at Remus, who offered him a smile and a shrug.

He pulled out the items, one by one: a black ring, something that looked suspiciously like a plug, something Sirius didn't know and a small ring, one to wear around your finger. And a... wait, was this...? "Wait, c-can you maybe t-tell me... what that's.. you know. What you use it for?" Sirius blushed heavily and shifted, his uncomfortability increasing. Remus chuckled and took gently hold of the toys in Sirius' hand. His fingers brushed over Sirius' palm and fingertips, and suddenly the air was getting too hot.

"This," Remus started holding up the black ring, "is a cock ring. This one is made of silicone, it's more suitable for beginners. Maybe if we like it, we're going to buy a leather one, or a metal one. It can be used to get different results."

"Wh-what results, for example?" Sirius was stuttering and he scratched at the collar of his shirt, his trousers starting to get tight.

Remus smirked, "Well. You use it around your cock, of course. It can increase sensation, because the blood is slightly trapped in your cock, your erection may also get a bit bigger. You can last longer, too. And it helps you control your orgasm, so it can be easier for me to tell Benjy not to cum until I say so." Remus shrugged and Sirius gulped, shooing his dirty thoughts away.  
  
"This," Remus continued, holding up the plug, "Is a butt plug. It goes inside your arse, if you haven't guessed it. But, this one has something special." Remus slipped on the ring on his middle finger and pressed the small button on top with his thumb. Sirius flushed again, as he heard the buzzing. "It's vibrating. And I can control it." It was silver and had a blue crystal base. The ring was silver as well, a little blue gem as a button.

"Alright, two more to go. Here we have," he said, holding out the object Sirius couldn't place, "Bed restraints. Something like handcuffs, but we wanted them rather than handcuffs with Benjy's uncle being a police officer. It'd be weird. Yeah, I can tie him up a bit, and they're made of leather, it looks really good, I bet the black'd look really pretty against white... Anyways, let's move onto the last item. I bet you have guessed already. Yeah, it is a collar. A leather one, but it's one for humans, not dogs like yours." He chuckled, and Sirius' cock literally felt like it was going to burst. The restraints were leathern, each with a clip and some sort of chain, probably to attach it to the bedpost. The collar was plain black leather, a metal ring on the front - as if to attach a leash - and a metal padlock on the back. Sirius was leaking by now.  
  
"I hope that helped. Any questions?"  
  
"N-No. Uhh, I think I gotta go pee, or something," he mumbled, body flushed and heated. He sprinted out of the dorm and towards the bathroom, locking it and running to the toilet. He shoved his trousers down to pool around his ankles, along with his underwear, and started tugging harshly on his cock, leaking pre-cum and panting. He thought about Remus and about his cock and about the collar. He thought about himself, face down on a big four poster, restrained and bound, collar snugly around his neck. He thought about Remus and then his vision went white as he came, painting the toilet and the floor in cum, biting his arm to muffle his shout.  
  
 _"Fuck, Remus...!"_

* * *

He just couldn't fucking help himself.

He knew it was fucking _wrong,_ but he just couldn't _fucking help himself_.

There he was, a silencing charm placed on himself, James' cloak over him, sitting in the dorm he should've left half an hour ago on behalf of Remus' wish, watching Remus and Benjy make out furiously on Remus' bed. They were panting and moaning and tugging at each others clothes. Their ties were undone and Benjy's button up was hanging over the lamp on the bedside table. Remus was on top of Benjy, his knees between Benjy's legs, while Benjy was clinging to Remus like there was no tomorrow. His legs were wrapped around Remus's waist and his arms around his neck, letting himself be pressed into the mattress. Remus was kissing him forcefully but still with an air of gentleness, leaving no doubt of who was in charge.

Sirius didn't even know _why_ he was there, watching, observing.

Benjy's chocolate brown hair was mussed up, lips swollen and glistening, cheeks tinged red. He looked pretty handsome, Sirius had to admit, and regretfully Sirius could see why Remus was attracted to Benjy.

Remus' mouth was firmly attached to his boyfriend's chest, licking and sucking until Benjy was arching off the bed with a small 'Ah!' and they were kissing again, tongues sliding against each other, making wet and - Sirius admitted reluctantly - hot noises. If Sirius hadn't been hard, he definitely would've been by now.

A moaned 'Fuck, Remus!' made him see Remus' curls sticking out between Benjy's legs. Surprisingly... bare legs. When did he get the trousers off?

But something was off. Sirius' first thought was _Fuck, Remus is giving Benjy a blow job._ But then he noticed that Remus' head didn't really match up with _the_ part of Benjy's anatomy. His head was way too much down to be his cock, so what could he... Sirius' eyes widened at the realization, but now he didn't have any doubt anymore.

"Flip over," Remus growled and Benjy obeyed, getting on his knees and leaning on his forearms. Remus gripped his bare arse with his large hands, cupping the pink cheeks and _holy mother of Merlin_ burying his head _right there_. And Sirius didn't think it could feel good, but by the way Benjy was moaning, the boy fucking _enjoyed it_ , the way he enthusiastically thrusted back against Remus' mouth, the way he arched his back and called Remus' name, it left no doubt the the boy was _very much_ enjoying himself.

But not only he: Remus, too, made humming sounds, his eyes closed in bliss, as if he ate the _very most delicious_ thing he had _ever_ eaten in his whole _fucking_ life. Well.

"Gah! Remus!"

Remus' fingers were dripping wet and inside Benjy's arse now, fingering him open in a skillful manner, making Sirius wonder how often he had _actually_ fucked someone. Had he fucked girls, as well? Or was he exclusively into boys? Had Remus ever watched _him_ in the shower? Sirius couldn't recall.

Not Benjy was sitting up and undoing Remus' belt, and Sirius leaned forward, _finally_ about to see what apparently was a _monstrosity_ in his pants, when Benjy whispered something in Remus' ear. Remus drew back, surprised, whipped his head in... wait wait what? He looked directly in Sirius' direction!

"Sirius," Remus called out cautiously. He stayed still, didn't dare to let himself breathe. "Are you sure?"

Benjy looked in his direction. "Yeah, Re. Go over there and, I don't know. How is he even hiding? He can't be that good at disillusionment charms. Right?"

"No, but I know how. Sirius, if you are really there, please go, now. Just fucking leave," Remus' eyes flashed up angrily, his canines starting to grow. Benjy laid a soothing hand on his shoulder.

"Shh, calm now. Do you want me to go to the bathroom, so you can sort it out?" Sirius hated the guy even more for his gentle voice and comforting manner.

"Yeah," Remus snapped out of the daze he was in and his eyes and teeth grew normal again, "Yes, please. Sorry." Benjy offered him a smile and a peck before he climbed off the bed, erection still firmly in place, and walked to their bathroom, locking the door behind him.

Remus shot out of bed and in a heartbeat Sirius was sitting there, without cover, cloak in Remus' hand. Remus' face twisted up in anger. "What. The. Fuck." he words were half spat out half hissed out.

Sirius' eyes were wide and he panicked, heart not beating and breath holding. He was so fucked, how would he ever explain this?

"Sirius. I do not want to know why you are here, but this is crossing every fucking line. Just go the fuck out!" Remus' voice was loud and Sirius bowed his head in shame.

"R-Remus, I-" "I don't fucking want to hear it! Just get the fuck out of here!" Sirius knew he fucked up bad, Remus hardly ever cursed and when he did, it was usually because he was _extremely_ furious.

Sirius stood up, shoulders slumped, face burning in shame, tears threatening to spill.

"Go. Now."

Outside of the dorm, he slid down the wall, hands buried in his hair, and let the silent tears fall.

* * *

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Leave a comment and Kudos if you liked it,  
> See you next chapter <3

**Author's Note:**

> So, thanks for reading, I would be honored if you leave Kudos, comments are very appreciated, brighten up my day, and even though I may not respond to every single one, I definitely read every one and I can't even describe what my insides feel like after I read one of those sweet comments! 
> 
> Anyways, hope I see you next chapter! <3


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